Going Deeper in “Courageous Conversations”
Read the following slowly a few times:
Matt 18:15-20; Eph 4:15; James 1:19; Gal 6:1-2; 1 John 4:18
Going Deeper Questions:
1. In verse 15, Jesus says, “go privately.” Why do you think Jesus wants us to begin with the person rather than talking about the person to others?
2. What usually makes it difficult for you to approach someone who has hurt or offended you?
3. Jesus says the goal is to “win that person back” (v. 15). How is that different from trying to win an argument? What motives might we need to examine in ourselves before confronting someone?
4. Why is listening just as important as speaking in a courageous conversation? How can assumptions about another person's motives make conflict worse?
5. Why do you think Jesus tells us to keep the first conversation private? What does that communicate about respect and love?
6. Verses 16–17 describe what to do when the first conversation doesn't resolve the issue. What do these steps tell us about how seriously Jesus takes both accountability and reconciliation?
7. Jesus says, “Where two or three gather together as my followers, I am there among them” (v. 20). How does the context of conflict and reconciliation change the way you understand this familiar verse?
8. Imagine Jesus sitting in a third chair during your next difficult conversation. How might His presence change your words, tone, and willingness to listen?
This Week's Challenge
1. Think of one relationship where something has been left unresolved. Before doing anything, pray: Jesus, examine my heart. Help me seek restoration rather than victory. Give me courage to speak truth with love, humility to listen, and grace to recognize where I may be wrong. And when we sit down together, remind me that You are in our midst. Amen.
2. Then, if appropriate, take the first step. Don't talk about them. Talk to them. Don't try to win the argument. Try to win the relationship.
And don't forget to leave a chair for Jesus.